So, yesterday I went to see Wristcutters: A Love Story with Team Talent. There was a guy in the same row as us who, I fairly certain, was put on earth to make as much noise as humanly possible while doing things that required no noise. Everytime he took a sip of his gluttonously large soda he had to let out an “aaahhhhh” afterwards. Every damn time. And when he breathed, he had to let everyone know about it. Yes, he was a bit, shall we say, overweight, but damn dude, breath with some quietness yo.